When parents fight, children get scared. Parents acting in the best interest of their children work to reduce conflict around their children. Mediation is an excellent way for parents to reduce conflict.
In my Maryland practice, mediation is hard work. Parents negotiate who will have primary physical custody. Some parents negotiate a cooperative agreement and attempt to share physical custody. Parents who mediate are interested in reaching a mutually agreeable plan rather than having an arrangement dictated by the court, or a stranger in a black robe.
Where it is agreed one parent will have primary physical custody, the mediation process helps parents work out a visitation schedule. In mediation parents also learn how to communicate and negotiate independently, or without a third party, which is helpful when future events arise that may cause conflict, e.g., significant changes in a parent's or child's schedule.Child support, which parent will pay the other, and how much, is an issue that a mediator assists parents discuss in mediation. Some couples negotiate the issue of spousal support, or alimony. Property settlement, who will stay in the family home, or what will become of marital property, is also negotiated in mediation.
Parents reaching an agreement and reducing the stress to which their children are exposed is in the best interest of their children. The majority of couples can reach an agreement through mediation. Parents who do not reach a negotiated agreement may have a stranger in a black robe render a decision, spend lots of money on attorneys, end up without custody or with little visitation, and increase the resentment felt toward each another.
