Maryland Mediation Blog

Recently, a small group of people gathered to honor the birthday of a middle aged woman ("birthday girl"). She, her two young adult daughters, and three other women dined at a family owned Mediterranean restaurant. The waitstaff are always friendly and accommodating, and the aging owner delivers a free plate of assorted desserts to his regular customers.

Usually the volume in the restaurant is such that you can hear the conversation at your own table, and if you really listen, perhaps that of the table next to you. This evening was different because of the frequent and abrasive remarks of birthday girl sitting two tables away. "This bread isn't fresh!" She barked.

When the waitress apologetically replaced the bread, birthday girl did not acknowledge the waitress. When the appetizers were delivered, birthday girl hissed, "this tea does not have enough ice!"

"I'm sorry Ma'am." The waitress responded apologetically. "I will bring you another glass."

When the waitress returned with another glass of iced tea, birthday girl snarled, "why didn't you give us more olives?" By this time, birthday girl's daughters and friends looked as if they wanted to crawl under the table.

"Yes, Ma'am, I will bring you more olives right away." The waitress said as she scurried back to the kitchen.

Birthday girl could have obtained everything she wanted without embarrassing herself, her daughters, friends, and the waitress.

Especially when you are angry, how you communicate effects how you are heard. Emotions significantly effect communication and negotiation. If you are having difficulty getting your point across, or settling a dispute your emotions may be in the way. You do not have to lose the emotion, but, you may need to communicate more "creatively."

Mediation is confidential way to resolve problems. A mediator is a neutral third party who can help you communicate and negotiate more effectively. Mediators assist people in dispute to communicate more effectively, despite the strong emotions in the room, examine issues, identify solutions, and negotiate agreements.

In my Maryland mediation practice it is possible to schedule a mediation the same week you call. You may be able to reach an agreement in one session. Mediation costs $100 per hour per person. There are no up front retainers.

Do you have a dispute which you have not been able to resolve? Are you thinking about filing, or have you filed, a lawsuit?

Is your argument well supported by law? Or, are you hoping the passion of your moral and/or ethical argument will persuade a judge to overlook the fact your argument is not supported by law?

Are you comfortable with 50:50 odds in court? What happens if you go to court and do not win?

Do you know what you say in court is not confidential?

Would you consider a confidential alternative to going to court?

Mediation is a confidential win - win process. A mediator is a neutral third party who facilitates communication between people in dispute. A mediator assists people in dispute identify issues and alternative solutions, and negotiate and reach an agreement. A mediator is not a judge and does not decide who wins or loses, or who has the best argument.

If you are unable to reach an agreement in mediation you still have the right to go to court. Furthermore, what you discuss in mediation may not be discussed in court.

In my Maryland mediation practice it may be possible to schedule a mediation session the same week you call.

Depending on the nature of your dispute, you may reach a resolution in one session.

The cost is $100 per hour per person.